Every day of being a Momma is hard. Let’s face … every day is a battle. A battle of wits, a battle of patience, a battle with time. The harder battle is the mental battle in a moms brain when one child is sick. You want to give all your kids 110% all the time, but when one is sick that child may want 150% of your time …. and you still want to give that same 110% as you always do. How do you do more than you already do? How do you give them.more of yourself than you already do? Honestly, I dont have the answer other than “you just do”. Thats really what us Moms do anyway right?…. We just do! I dont know if I am a better Mom when they are sick or less of a Mom when thry are sick, but I sure do hope they know I try.

Before I was a Momma, life was great! I could enjoy so many things! Watch an entire television episode without interruption. A glass of wine and fully surrender to my thoughts. I could pair that wine with a full, healthy, and well prepared meal. I could fully chew every bite and enjoy every flavor. I could enjoy a freshly made cup of coffee and every sip would still be hot. I was able to do my nails… and I didnt have to use the dry-in-60second kind. I had the time to fully enjoy a bubble bath, being able to stay in the tub until wvery bubble had dissapeared and my fingers were all pruny. I was able to decide to go somewhere and leave the house in the same 5 minutes- just needed to change my clothes, brush my teeth, and put shoes on to walk out the door. I was able to lay out in the sun on a beach towel or in a recline shine and soak up every ray of sun for hours. I could drive just to drive and whereever I ended up was perfect.

Now I’m a Momma. Now I watch Mickey Mouse and enjoy seeing my children grasp the concept of the day or their pure excitement when they pick the right Mouscatool! Their pride in themselves and their smiles make any day better.

I am able to enjoy a glass of wine at night, but now it’s after every single one of my little angels are asleep. Let’s face it- there are days when they fall asleep in their beds, on a blanket on the floor, laying on the couch, or even at the dining room table in their highchair. But they are asleep and for those 5 to 10 minutes prior to moving them from their current sleeping place I will enjoy that glass fully knowing that I am their Momma and we made it to bedtime of yet another day.

I don’t get to do my nails. Lets be honest, even with the dry-in-60seconds nailpolish you still rush cause you dont know who will wake up or stir in their beds or cry from a nightmare. I just throw on the clear, make your nails look shiny, and hope for the best.

Now that I am a Momma I don’t take bubble baths. I don’t have time for me to do that type of luxury thing anymore. I do however get to see the joy of my little girls in their bubble baths. I fill the tub and add the bubbles. I close the glass shower doors and let them fully enjoy the fun of something so simple. They can splash the water and throw the bubbles and draw on the glass with their soapy hands. They smile at their silly creations and Santa Claus bubble beards. They make crazy hair styles with bubble “hair gel” and I get a front row seat at all their laughter.

Now that I am Momma I can no longer decide where I am going an leave in 5 minutes. It’s more of a 20 minute back and forth dialogue to leave the house repeating about 3 to 4 times of the same typenof question for the same task. “Get your shoes.” “Where are your shoes?” “Why dont you have your shoes on?” “You want to bring a toy for the car, fine go get it.” “Now you want to change your toy, seriously! We are right at the door!” But when they finally get dressed on their owns nd get their little toy that makes the drive fun or safe…. Im glad we made INTO the car (finally) and they are happy to be going for a drive. And to see them in the rearview mirror hugging their little toy friends is a moment of joy. Im glad I can bring them a moment of security from a single little toy.

I now longer get to lay outside by myself and soak up every ray of sunshine.  Now I see smiles from kids seeing how high I can throw them in the pool and how big their splash will be. See a child chalk on the ground and like their creation or even mix drawings together. I get to see pride in learning how to ride a bike, or hopscotching down the drive way. I soak up the moments of blowing bubbles …. the 5,646,442,736,549 in one afternoon simply for them to jump around and try catching them by clapping their hands on them on in a millisecond destroying the bubbles. Its repetitive but its the simple things that make them have fun.

There is no roadmap to parenthood. No directions. No alexa to tell you the right way or tell if your making a wrong turn but I will drive down the unknown road of Parenthood and whereever I end up I known.